The time I lost my motivation
I'm not really sure what happened, but here I am trying to get back on track again
I don’t know how it happened, but two months ago, I stopped writing my newsletter.
The first week that I missed, I told myself I’d get back to it next week and everything would be fine… but now here we are, eight weeks later…
I’m not lazy.
It’s not that I lack commitment or anything.
And it’s not as if I just randomly ran out of things to write about.
I just… got distracted one time…
and I didn’t feel like writing…
and then the second week came around and I didn’t feel like writing, again…
I feel kind of ashamed, now.
Although, shame isn’t exactly the right emotion, but it’s close enough I guess.
I thought I was doing something really important with my newsletter! I thought it was giving me purpose, and meaning, and satisfaction, to share my story each week. I thought it was making this tremendous impact in my readers’ lives! (Well maybe it still is… I guess that’s for my readers to decide for themselves.)
I really am, and have been, incredibly passionate about wanting to share! I thrive on connection — real, human connection — and I want to be a constant, positive influence in other people’s lives.
And yet…
I missed a handful of weeks of publishing my newsletter,
and it’s almost like I forgot it even exists…
Maybe what I feel right now isn’t shame… but embarrassment…
Like how could I forget my readers (a lot of you are my friends, after all!)
And what do I do now? How do I explain that I just didn’t feel like it one week, and the next week after that, I just totally forgot?
How do I come back from being so irresponsible?
Or am I being too hard on myself, for something that actually is not that big a deal?
I don’t know.
But all I can do now is to try and pick things up where I left them, two months ago, and try to move forward, and hope that I can get back into my groove pretty easily.
I feel sorry that I left you hanging.
And I hope you’ll give me a chance to make it up to you.